Unsmiling Halloween Pictures

Sage is in the High Five Choir at church and they sang at First Fest(our church's festival). It was the first thing we did and I have to say that Sage did not look excited at all nor did he seem to enjoy singing. But when it was over, he asked why they didn't sing more songs.


Sage the fire fighter.


Kolby the astronaut.


The fire fighter in the truck.


And Kolby.


On the mechanical bull.


And Kolby. It looks like Kolby might enjoy it, but it hasn't started yet.
They both had a really fun time although we don't have one picture of either of them smiling. They both rode a mechanical bull. The most fun part was before the bull started moving.

I missed the picture of Sage going down the giant slide because I was sitting down eating a sucker. I got a picture of Drew taking Kolby down the giant slide but I missed the part where Drew almost tumbled over with Kolby at the top, that would not have been good. Parents at the bottom literally gasped as Drew jumped onto his bottom holding Kolby. It didn't look like it was going to end well but everything was okay.

There was also a petting box with a donkey, 2 ducks and some rabbits. Sage stuck his hand in front of one of the rabbits mouths and got bit, or so he claims. I think he was thinking that like dogs, the rabbit needed to smell his hand before he could pet it. Kolby loved the animals and would squat down and say hi, hi.



I was bummed because we each got 4 pieces of candy. And 2 of the 4 were suckers. And none of it was chocolate. Somehow we missed all the candy. I was so looking forward to gorging myself on Halloween candy at the end of this pregnancy.

It was a really overwhelming festival for all of us. It ws a lot of fun, just overwhelming.

Sunday: A Review

We went to Sunday school, church, and then out to eat at Sam's Deli. Our family favorite Sunday after church lunch spot. Yummy burgers, fries and shakes for cheap!

I had planned to go grocery shopping since it didn't happen yesterday morning since I was sent back to bed my sweet husband who was protecting himself and our children from my grumpiness. And then I started having some contractions, at the restaurant, on the way home and then again when we got home.

Drew started "the list". He has made a list of the times of the contractions with each of our babies.

2:00
2:17
2:24
2:53
3:06
3:12
3:13
3:21
3:30
3:43
3:59

And then waiting, waiting, and no more.

Not all of them were really hard, but a couple brought tears to my eyes. My doctor has told me not to mess around.

I missed my chance to have this baby today. But I would have felt like I cheated somehow if I went. They were just so sporadic. They probably would have stopped after we got the kids dropped off at our friends house.

Sage was with us through all these and was so excited for the baby to be born. He even prayed that my water would break and the baby would come today.

I have my appointment on Tuesday. I don't know what I hope. I hope I have this baby soon.

And now, I have to go to the grocery store tomorrow morning, with the boys. Bummer.

Plea for Help

Yesterday, a mom was watching Kolby run ahead of us and commented on how cute he is to watch run. His little legs don't move very fast but his arms pump and pump and pump. It's like all the action is in his arms. Then she said, something about how he doesn't move fast but he tries hard.

And then she said "But, I guess he does have a little junk in his trunk."

I was a little taken aback and the only thing I could think of to say was yeah. Later, I decided, I should have said "I had that same thought watching you walk!" That was the unkind thing to say. I'm glad I didn't say it.

He was wearing hand me down pants from Sage and I'll admit, they were tight in the butt. All of his pants are a little tight and a little hard to button. If he is wearing a cloth diaper, forget buttoning!

That brings me to my plea for help. I need pants that actually fit Kolby. I feel bad telling my 2 year old to suck it in so I can button his pants! But, I'm cheap. And don't suggest Lands End because they have elastic waist, I have a pair of shorts from there for him and they were um, hard to pull up and down. Poor Kolby. I feel so badly sharing this information with the internet but I need help! I've looked at MiniBoden but I don't know if I can bring myself to spend $34 on one pair of pants for him.

Who sells a husky 3T?

I Might Miss Something

With the impending birth of this baby, I feel like if I let myself take too much time away from our normal activities that I might miss something.

See, I don't have close friends that I talk to everyday here. (I'm not complaining, just stating a fact.) So, we have things we go to most days of the week and I see the same moms whom I relate to and can talk to and have a little bit of adult time with. And, if I miss those things, I'll miss those connections, those few interactions with people over the age of four.

And, I know that it's not good for me to miss those connections, those snippets of conversations. I feel like they are on their way to making good friends.

Also, after Kolby's birth, I had a really hard time. I got depressed. I probably should have gone to see the doctor but that seemed like too much work. I had dropped our of my MOPS group because of the birth of Kolby and I hadn't made a friend anyway, so it didn't seem to matter. Our internet went down so I couldn't connect to anyone in the internet world either. Not that anyone actually read or reads this blog but it at least feels like something!

I don't want to slip into that depression again with this baby. I want to truly enjoy his infancy and if that means bringing him with us to our differing activities, that is what we'll do.

I have learned that I can be sustained on these snippets of adult conversation. I need those. I have also seen in the last week that I need to wake up before my kids and read my Bible and do my study. It makes all of our days go better.

I have had some not so easy days and they weren't all due to the attitudes of my children. More mine. I have been impatient with them and prone to anger. I don't like it and neither do they. It makes us all grouchy. Which is not surprising.

Last night at our Midlink Bible study, Isaiah 61:3 was read. "...and to provide ff or those who grieve in Zion- to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor."

I want to wear a garment of praise in my everyday life. Starting today.

What garment are you wearing?

**See, I don't want to miss this stuff. I need this stuff!

37 Weeks and Counting

The only exciting thing that I have going on in my life is this baby and how soon it will come out. I know, not terribly exciting, unless you're me or my mom. It just freaks Drew out to think how close we are to having a newborn in our house.

So, I am at the same place that I was last week. Nothing has changed. He said possibly you will have this baby in the next 7 - 10 days. I think he might be lying.

Sunday and Monday I felt really good, I wanted our house clean and picked up and I was doing laundry like a madwoman. It made me think that nothing had changed. I just felt so good. The baby isn't resting on my bladder anymore so I can go more than 20 minutes before I have to find a facility.

And all this makes me think back to when I was a mere 10 weeks and they told me after an ultrasound that I was really 11 weeks. It makes me think that they were off. And that would put me at 36 weeks. And then this would all make more sense.

But, in the end, does it really matter? Not really, but right now it matters because the more weeks along I am, the closer I am to feeling comfortable again. Maybe I'll be able to make it a whole day without saying "My belly hurts." or "I need to lay down because my belly hurts."

The other really exciting thing in my life right now? The weather. It has been drastically cooler here this week and it has been so lovely. It was 50 degrees this morning. I wore a sweater and jeans. And took the sweater off after lunch but still. Sage talks about how freezing it is and how perfect it is for us to make a fire and roast marshmallows in our fireplace. Guess it's time to call that chimney sweep!

Picture Day

You might not want to look at these if you are eating or easily disgusted. Or, enlarge them and get a better view!

The Waiting: He's showing us his bracelet.


The Before: This is better looking than at home when I was trying to decide if he needed stitches. I got a good piece of advice from a nurse at our pediatricians office. "If the sides of the wound aren't touching, it needs stitches."


The During: It kind of grossed me out seeing her pull his flesh together with a needle.


The During:


The After: He kept moving so it was hard to get a good after shot. It is all greasy because of the neosporin.


The Proof: He wrote TOY!


Maybe he was able to start writing his name and toy because of this bonk to his head!

The Amazing Sage

Yesterday, from the dining room, I hear, "I wrote my name, S A G E!" We told him to show it to us. He proudly walked over with the sheet of paper and sure enough, he had written his name! And, it was in the right order going from right to left.

Drew and I were very surprised and kind of laughed and told him what a good job it was.

This morning, he was playing with the magna doodle and said "Look, I wrote TOY!" And sure enough he had. (I took a picture but I still can't find the card reader.) He learned how to spell toy from Toy Story when Woody tells Buzz "You are a toy, T O Y, toy!" Then he proceeded to write zoo but he got the z backwards.

We have been doing a little bit of "homeschool". I put it in quotations because we aren't consistent with it and I don't have a real curriculum just some Hooked on Phonics for his lower case letter recognition and handwriting (which I haven't really started) stuff and he colors. Maybe I am holding him back by not doing it everyday with him. Just add it to the list of things that should be getting done in a day!

*This post is mainly for my mom. I know many 4 year olds are much more advanced! But we're proud of our Sage!

My Crazy Body

36 weeks plus a few days.

2 - 3 cm. dilated.

100% effaced.

Head still low.

The nurse had trouble getting his heartbeat because he was moving around so much. She called him a varmint. I thought that was a little strange.

The doctor said to not dilly dally when I go in to labor. Thanks for the tip! He also said he wants to see me make it to 37 weeks but if I make it to 38, which he highly doubts, he will induce me if I want.

With the boys, I guess I was technically induced, they broke my water both times. With Kolby, I was 37 weeks 5 days and they were guessing 5 or 6 cm dilated but his head was so low it was hard to tell. She didn't want to send me home like that, so they broke my water and 56 minutes later out came Kolby without a push!

Sage was born at 38 weeks and some days. I was 5 cm dilated with him also. I had gone in the night before with regular irregular contractions meaning they were coming but not every 5 or 10 minutes like they told me to look for. Once we got to the hospital with all our gear, we spent the night since the contractions completely stopped and they sent us home about 8 that morning. That night about 10 we checked back in, they broke my water and 4 hours later he was born. But I pushed for an hour and 15 minutes.

In my mind, when I am thinking clearly, I want to keep this baby inside until 38 weeks. Let him put on some weight and make sure his lungs are ready to be out here.

When I am not thinking clearly, I think come on! I watch myself waddle towards the glass doors to pick up the boys at Mothers Day Out and think, how am I gonna hold this baby in?! And when I get a painful braxton hic, I automatically look at the time and wait to see if I get another. (Are they called braxton hics anymore, I mean, they can be quite painful, aren't they just contractions? Then I could tell people I was in labor for weeks instead of just an hour or so!)

And then sane Kristy comes back in and thinks about how I would really like a November baby (no logical reason) and how I really want to make it to 38 weeks.

Part of me really wonders how long I would go if I just let my body do its thing.

And part of me thinks that would be crazy and I would end up delivering at home. By myself. And I don't really want that. If I planned a home birth, that would be different.

My doctor did mention that he would prefer to have me in a controlled setting and induce me. Part of me agrees.

The past two nights, I have slept really well. I have actually woken up and forgotten that I was pregnant. I was so comfortable and my belly wasn't hurting me, no head was pressing against my bladder and then I get a swift kick to my belly and remember that I am in fact pregnant and it is in fact going to be painful to roll over and get myself out of bed.

I can't wait to meet this little guy. We have a couple names we agree on and we have agreed to see him and decide.

Don't tell Sage or Kolby but I ordered matching pajamas for all three boys today (a traditional Christmas eve present) and am so excited to take their picture! What are the odds that Sage won't have an accident and that Kolby and new baby's diaper won't leak that night?!

Another First

First for those curious, I do feel a lot better. I didn't make it to church on Sunday but by Sunday night I could complete my mama tasks. And today I feel as close to 100% as possible for a nine month pregnant lady.
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I lazily stayed in bed this morning listening to the boys play in their room wishing that I hadn't stayed up until midnight last night putting sheets on the queen bed in the baby/guest room. (Which is almost done! Crib needs set up and I need to get out our tub of baby clothes and organize but we are so close! My mom could arrive and we would be proud to have her sleep there!)

Anyway, as I was rounding the corner to come down the stairs I heard a little crash and a wail. Sage was ahead of me so I started saying "Sage, what happened?" I only got a wail in response. He was standing as I ran down the stairs. I saw that he had dropped his "tickets" (clothing price tags) and beside it looked like some sort of red toy that I didn't realize he had. I sat on the bottom step and noticed blood all over his hands. I saw blood dripping all over our carpeted landing. I couldn't figure out where it was coming from.

I turned him around saw a lot of blood in his pretty blonde curls. I prayed out loud. "Lord, help me know what to do." I took his pajama shirt off and pressed it against his head. I called my mom. She told me to get it cleaned out and see if it needed stitches.

The blood wasn't dripping anymore, so I took him upstairs to our bathroom to try to clean it out with peroxide. I just kept dumping it on his head. He had stopped crying and I could tell that the gash was pretty open but couldn't see how deep since it was always bloody.

This was about 7:50am. I waited until 8 and called the pediatrician and hoped that I could bring him in there to get stitches rather than the ER. No go. But she did tell me that if the two sides of the wound were not touching, stitches were probably required.

Sage was totally calm and back to normal by this point. I figured we should all eat breakfast before we go wait in the ER for who knows how long. So we ate, I packed a bag of suckers and fruit snacks for bribes and a bag of toys for the waiting.

When I came downstairs with Sage to get breakfast, Kolby had helped himself to 3 yogurts and was getting a spoon. The little stinker. I didn't even scold him, just helped him open one to eat! He was just taking care of himself!

We went to the ER, got checked in, taken right back to the ER room and within 5 minutes the nurse practitioner had come in and looked at his head. She confirmed he needed stitches, 2 or 3. I asked if we had to shave any of his hair. I was so relieved when she answered no!

She came back and gave them each a sucker and Sage was working on the magna doodle so she had him look down and do that while she numbed the area and then stitched it and cleaned it.

He did so great. No tears at all. I was so impressed. I had pictured this huge ordeal trying to hold him down while he screamed and screamed.

We had heard a song on the cd that he requested on the way to the ER that said essentially God will give you the power to be brave. I told Sage about it and prayed for him to be brave. God definitely answered yes to that prayer!

I have pictures to show you the gruesome details. But, I can't find my card reader and someone else was the last to use it so... those will have to wait.

Also, remember how upset I got when he got his first bloody nose at Chick-fil-A? I didn't feel that way at all this time. I was calm and collected. I figured out what to do and did it. I think it helped that Sage couldn't see all the blood and wasn't freaking out over it.

And hydrogen peroxide totally takes blood out of carpet. I might be trying it for his Buzz Lightyear pajamas too!

A random note, the nurse practitioner asked if I was pregnant! She couldn't tell. I was sitting down but really, kind of strange. I guess it is good she isn't an OB nurse!

I'm off to nap, I'll try to post the pictures tomorrow.

I'm Stupid

Today, while we were at a birthday party for one of Sage's friends, Sage got another bloody nose. This time, thanks to his brother. Personally, I think Kolby was paying him back for all those tackles that Sage loves to give. Realistically, a two year old was holding a putt-putt club and his 4 year old brother was standing within striking distance. It was a complete accident.

What I did though, was just completely neurotic. I saw the blood, Drew was right there to help Sage, I was a couple steps behind. I took off running to the clubhouse to get paper towels. In my mind, no one out on the putt-putt golf course would have something that we could use to absorb all the blood. I didn't have my purse or diaper bag, they were in the car, so why would another mother be prepared?! As soon as I took off running, my 9 month pregnant body screamed that it was a stupid, stupid decision. Know what I did? Kept running. Yep. I don't know what I looked like, but in my mind, I was running really fast. Realistically, I probably looked hilarious, but let's not dwell on that.

Another mother did have a diaper bag or something, because she provided a wet wipe that worked perfectly. And my paper towels were rendered useless.

So, the useless paper towels that I so desperately needed caused much pain in my body. I can seriously hardly walk.

All for the love of my child. And not getting blood on his precious, green, soccer t-shirt he insisted on wearing. (I hope you catch the sarcasm, I don't love the soccer t-shirt)

And that is why the rest of the day I have moaned and groaned as I've wobbled and waddled my way from the bathroom and back to the couch.

Doctor Appointment

I had my 35 week check up today. And an ultra sound. The tech said it was a bio physical profile. She checked amniotic levels and the baby's movements, listened to his heartbeat and something else. She was surprised at how low he is, she could barely get to his head to check on something else. I could have told her he was low because of the nightly hiccups I get to experience. Not quite as strong as Kolby's but hiccups none the less. She guesstimated his weight at 5 lbs. 10 oz. A little guy!

The doctor did my group B strep test so checked things out. I had also told him that I had quite a few braxton hics on Saturday. When I say quite a few, I mean, they weren't stopping unless I was laying down.

I had been at a woman's retreat until 2:30 and was so uncomfortable during the afternoon sessions. I just couldn't find a way to sit that was comfortable with my belly and it was like one long braxton hic. I got in my car to come home and had had it. I was so tired and so needing to lay down.

I took a wrong exit on the way home. Traffic backed way up. Enter contractions that are harder that I was actually breathing through a little, not bad but very uncomfortable and I may have started crying.

I finally got home and waddled into the house and burst into tears. Drew didn't know what to do with me. I laid around the rest of the day. I was the useless parent in the house.

Sunday, I felt much better but still had a few contractions.

Anyway, the point of this is to say, I feel much better today. I know to go to the 4th floor of the hospital.

Oh and also, I'm a few centimeters dilated already. The doctor made a comment that as long as I stay just a few centimeters, we'll let him stay in as long as possible. Pray that I can be strong and insist that it is okay for me to walk around 4 - 5 centimeters dilated and that this baby will get bigger, stronger and develop everything in time.

With Kolby I was at 5 centimeters at 36 weeks. I know how my body works but I do get anxious at the end. Anxious for details that I have no control over.

I just keep laying it all at the Lord's feet. That's what he's there for anyway!

Reason #485 Moving Stinks

Moving stinks for a number of different reasons. My reason for today is doctors. I hate finding new doctors and then waiting to actually see them.

I made appointments for the boys in June or July for November for regular pediatric appointments. Sage's will be his 4 year old check up and Kolby will be because Sage is going and why not? I can handle that, they aren't really needed for any specific reason.

And, I'm not going to mention that the new OB I've been seeing just informed me that he is moving his office to about an hour away. Oh, and that the pediatrician that the kids are seeing are dropping our insurance come April. I'm trying to pretend that isn't happening.

But, Kolby needs an orthopedic doctor for his feet. His last check up was February 2008. The first available appointment is February 2, 2009. That is a year in between check ups. And there is the small detail of the shoes that he wears to bed every night. He is starting to outgrow them. And at the appointment, I need all his medical records. Which I knew. But my doctor in Connecticut said the new doctor will be able to get them, I didn't need to worry about bringing them with me. WRONG! I have to have them all at the first appointment.

Lesson learned: Do not leave a state without all your medical records to take with you. And, once you have gotten those records, make copies and keep them so that if or when you move again, you will have the first set to take with you to a new doctor. And don't forget to get your current records!

I feel like I have failed Kolby. His feet give me no reason to think that I need to take him to the doctor, but I would like that confirmation from a doctor.

I dragged my feet in scheduling his appointment and finding a doctor because there is one Ponseti certified doctor in Houston. And he of course, is not in our insurance plan. So, I haven't wanted to make an appointment with someone that I don't know what they are going to say to me.

Part of me thinks that the doctor will say, "His feet look great, let's discontinue the bar" and then Kolby will relapse. I am pretty adamant that he wear his bar until he is at least 4. He expects to wear his shoes and bar and sleeps better with them anyway.

It will take a lot of faith on my part to discontinue use of the bar. When he wears the bar, I am doing something. When it is over, it's in God's hands. Actually, it has always been in God's hands. He's got the whole world in his hands, including Kolby's feet.

Breathe in, breathe out. I already feel better. I might have failed in getting a doctor appointment sooner, but God has it all in his hands. I've done my part, the appointment is made. I'll fax the release forms to Connecticut today and then I'll wait on the Lord.

Writing everything out makes me come to my senses. And after re-reading this, it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to anyone but me and maybe my mom.

A New Day

I'm sitting at the computer listening to my children sing loudly at the top of their lungs and Sage comes down to share this: "Mom, we are upstairs, praising the Lord!"

But that wasn't what I wanted to write about today. I just thought it was precious.

My level of patience this week has been zero. Zero. Surprisingly, when my patience level is low, very low, the kids don't have that great of a day either.

We were on our way to church on Wednesday night and I said to Sage, "You have done nothing but whine and complain all day."

And then I thought, but what have I done all day? Maybe I am not as vocal as Sage but in my mind and heart, I have only been whining and complaining. Hm, wonder where he gets it?

But you know what, it hasn't been just a day. It's been all week. The week of No Patience.

Even this afternoon as I was trying to take a nap with Sage I was getting so annoyed that he would move and how dare he move in a bed while he is looking at a book and make it so that I can not sleep!

Everyday I think today is a new day. My patience will have returned. And then they want breakfast. And Kolby starts with his "Mama. Mama" every 2 seconds and never follows the "Mama." with anything but another "Mama."

I took this week as a laying low week. Sage has a cough that just won't go away, so we haven't been to the gym all week. I thought that would help with my patience since I wouldn't be trying to rush out the door in the morning so I could get on the elliptical right as Regis and Kelly were starting. But, no. I have still been low on patience.

And, I know what your thinking, mom, pray for patience. I sure have. Many times.

And many times have I apologized to my kids for not having patience.

But tomorrow is a new day. A day where I will be away from the kids most of the time at a womans retreat. And then a new week.

And you know what is coming next week? Pictures of the baby/guest room completed! Even though, there is only one wall of wallpaper border scraped so far. It will be done by Wednesday the 15th.

Patience!

Dear Mr. Weather Man,

I don't know why I called you dear because I don't hold you dear in my heart. Not this year, anyway.

You keep giving us weather appropriate for our region, but I can't help but roll my eyes and sigh everyday when I hear or read the forecast. And then you try to give me hope by saying a cold front is coming in! A cold front, bringing mid eighties! That is not a cold front!

Did you know that the date is October 7? OCTOBER! I am supposed to be making yummy soups, pumpkin bread, chili, shepherds pie.

I am supposed to be wearing jeans, everyday. Without thinking about it, wake up and get dressed in my jeans and a sweatshirt. At least a long sleeve shirt, maybe even a jacket on top. Definitely no flip flops anymore.

Do you know what I am wearing everyday? Flip flops. Shorts. Skirts. Short sleeved dresses. T-shirts.

What am I cooking? I don't know. I keep trying to cook fall like meals. They just don't taste as yummy. And it is so hard to want to make potato soup when it is 88 degrees plus humidity.

I try to pretend it is fall and burn my favorite candle but it just isn't the same. I look outside and see bright sunshine and green leaves. The only dead leaves are from Hurricane Ike.

I don't even want to buy gourds and pumpkins to decorate my mantle. It just doesn't seem right.

I try to have a good attitude, but really, the pool is still open. Sage still wants to go swimming every afternoon. I just can't do it.

Maybe in January or February, I will enjoy the forecasts a little more.

Sincerely,

Kristy

Drama Trauma

We went to Chick-fil-A for lunch today. It was a special treat for the boys and then we were going to pick out Sage's school supplies because we have been sorely lacking in that department. We don't have a red crayon or children's scissors or anything else really. It was supposed to be fun.

Sage and Kolby were in the play area and I was chatting with a mom at a different table, just a little and then I heard it. The sound of Sage's cry. He was just coming out of the door, his face was twisted up into his cry and his hands were balled up by his mouth and nose.

I was asking what happened? what happened? as I scooped him up, moved his hands to check for blood and walked back to our table. The whole restaurant was looking at us because Sage isn't a quiet crier. He's loud, very loud. His head went right to my shoulder and something made me want to check for blood again. I pulled my shoulder back and craned my neck to look at his face. And that's when I saw it. Blood pouring from his nose and into his open mouth. I was surprised and stood up quickly carrying him to where there were napkins. It sounded like the whole restaurant gasped, but maybe it was just me. I said "Jesus, help." An employee asked if she could bring me a bag of ice, I said sure. I was trying to hold napkins continuously under his nose and comfort him. As I threw the dirty napkins into the trash can, I noticed the trash can was missing. I knew nobody wants to pick up someone else's bloody napkins, so I picked them up and set them on a clean napkin on the counter where Sage was sitting. The blood slowed quickly to a trickle, I asked for a glass of ice water for him since he had blood in his mouth and he started to calm down.

I grabbed a bunch more napkins and realized that I had left Kolby at our table eating his ice-cream. I looked up and the sweet mom that I had been chatting with earlier had gotten up and stood next to Kolby while I dealt with Sage. I thanked her as she gathered her kids and left. Kolby never stopped eating his ice cream.

We started to make our way out, getting Sage's shoes from the play area and cleaning up Kolby after his ice cream.

Then came the sneeze. The sneeze that sent blood droplets flying through the air landing on me, Sage and the floor. Luckily, the table across from us was empty! The bummer is that I have to wash my maternity shorts that I just washed again and they weren't even stretched out enough as it was.

The story finally came out. Sage was going down the slide and a little girl decided to climb up it. And BAM! Bloody nose.

My son's first bloody nose was from a girl. And he was the only one crying.

(I think, I didn't really look around the restaurant to see if anyone else came out crying, actually I did see one little kid but I thought it was a boy that was crying and Sage said it was a girl climbing up the slide.)

I have a strange reaction when my kids get hurt. I go into fix it mode but at the same time, I am on the verge of bursting into tears. I hate seeing them crying and bloodied. It's part fear too. Fear of what else could be wrong that I can't see yet. Fear that it is something that I won't be able to fix with a handful of napkins, lots of hugs and kisses and maybe a little Tylenol.

Sage decided to forgo Target and opted to go right home. He was a little shook up. Now, he is resting, make that napping next to me on the bed. I might still be a little shook up too.

On Making Friends

I've lived in this new city for 4 months now. I no longer plug in the GPS every time I get in the van. I can get us around our daily lives without directions. I know where the good library is with the good story times. I know which grocery store I like the best and almost know where all the items on my list are.

We even have a routine of sorts. Monday is laundry day. Tuesday is MDO, grocery shopping and doctor appointments. Wednesday is either MOPS, stay home or do something fun with the boys. Thursday is CBS. Friday mornings are swimming lessons (for 2 more weeks).

Lately, I have been squeezing in time at the gym too. Don't you wish you could see this almost 8 month pregnant lady sweating on the elliptical machine?! The boys love the child center and I love being able to workout and shower knowing the boys are safe and having fun. There are lots of things I love about our gym but that is not the point.

On Tuesday, I decided the MDO days are a little lonely for me. Sure, I can get through the grocery store faster and I usually make sure I get Chick-fil-A for lunch. But it is a quiet day. I don't have anyone to talk to or answer questions. And I know that is kind of the point of the day but it gets lonely. I have other times during the week that I am away from the boys and get a break, the gym, MOPS and CBS. I am away but not really. At those places, we are all getting something good for us.
I am not ready to give up MDO because I know the boys enjoy it and I know I will enjoy the time after the baby is born too, for all those doctor appointments and just extra cuddles with my new little guy and maybe some groceries will get picked up too.

But, I haven't made many friends. Sure, I have friends at the various places that we go. Or rather people that I talk to regularly. I do have one friend in the neighborhood but her 4 year old is in all day pre-school and she works from home, so we don't spend a ton of time together. And, I don't expect to spend a ton of time with friends in this stage of life, moms are busy with little ones at home, I get that.

I really want a good group of girlfriends. I crave that. I fill it with other things like various group activities and our Sunday School class has a girls night out that I go to, but it just isn't the same. I crave the intimacies of a group of girls, I crave being able to call someone and ask them to meet me and my crazies for lunch somewhere or just getting together to let the kids play and drink a coffee or a Dr. Pepper. I crave having girlfriends that know me, that get me, that enjoy being around me for just me, not because we are in the same group activity.

I have filled a void and feel less lonely than when we first moved here, but life still doesn't look the way I had imagined it.

And that isn't to say that I am not content. I am content. I love my life. I can't say I love living in Houston because it has been and continues to be a big adjustment. It just takes time.

Time.

The Baby's Room

This is probably not the post you are hoping for. I have no pictures of a completed room because the room is not complete. In fact, it is still painted pink, has a floral border around the top, with a floral valance and the quilt that used to be on Drew and I's bed.

The crib is in there in pieces, leaning against the wall. The bassinet is ready to go except I need to wash the sheets. The changing pad is sitting on top of the dresser that is still full of the things that we packed inside the dresser.

Yesterday, we picked the paint color, Sassy Green. I have the bedding for the crib. I got the sheet and the crib skirt. And the wall decals. You know what's funny? We aren't planning on buying a new mattress until the baby needs it, so I won't have a mattress to put the sheet on for a couple months!

And I think I might order this for a fun graphic to hang on the wall. Thanks for the idea, Julia! I've always been a little obsessed with monkeys.

The guest bed has this bedding waiting for it.

Drew and I made a deal today. I was feeling very overwhelmed with the room not being ready and time running out. And I know that it doesn't matter if the room is ready for the baby or not. And really, if it were just for the baby, I wouldn't care. But, as soon as the baby is born, my mom is coming. She'll stay, for how long, mom? Then, sometime in December Drew's sister is coming to visit. She leave for Guatemala in early January and won't have another opportunity. Then, the beginning of January, we are traveling to MN for Drew's brothers wedding. Drew's parents will fly home with me and the boys. So, really, I want the room ready for guests. The baby coming is just a good deadline. We were having a hard time getting started today. Drew let me sleep in, I lazily made cinnamon rolls and sat around all morning. Drew took the boys to play outside, shooting rockets and playing catch. Then the football game came on. That is when we started making deals. I expressed my concern with the lack of work going on in the baby's room and he decided that he would do everything if I just left him to it by a certain date. We decided on October 15.

I am not to lift a finger in that room. He will take the wall paper down, tape, trim and paint the walls. Then, we'll decide how we are arranging the wall stickers and I hope to get to make the guest bed because there is just something about making up a new bed. Do you know how hard it is to agree to this? It sounds ideal but then I have no control!

And then, I will pull out the tub of 0-3 month clothing and see what we have. I'm pretty sure we have everything he'll need. I picked up a new package of Carters onesies at a second hand store the other day, along with a Bumbo with a tray.

We may have decided on a name but there is no official word out yet.

And, I'm still looking (not hard) for the perfect coming home outfit. I don't know why that is special to me, but it is!

So, after October 15, I should have a completed baby/guest room. Can't wait to show you pictures!

I have a dream.

I want to be a writer. I want to be a writer that gets paid to write.

I've done some research and found a book that supposedly tells you about editors of magazines, how to send them queries and what they specifically look for. But, I've read mixed reviews about it. Some say it is the best book and it got them published, others say it is republished every year with the same information.

I found a contest in Real Simple magazine. 1500 words or less to write about The Most Important Day of My Life. I entered. After January 9, I can send them a self addressed stamped envelope and find out who won and who will be published.

Maybe I won't check. I have 3.5 months to decide. Unless I get an email...

32 Week Reflection

I had my monthly doctor appointment this morning and I have gained no weight the last 4 weeks. I was so surprised! I mean, my shorts don't fit anymore, pants that I wore all through the pregnancy with Kolby, aren't making it. I can hardly pull them up. So, if I didn't gain weight, what do you call the competing bump in the back?!

This pregnancy has been very easy so far. My biggest complaint is an achy belly. I know, that is nothing.

Even though it has been easy, it has wreaked havoc on my body. Varicose veins have popped out loud and proud, I'm afraid my "normal" jeans will never be normal again. And there is one more thing that I would rather not mention. Let's just say, coughing isn't just coughing anymore.

I am getting so excited to meet this new little person, see how he fits in our family, see who he resembles. With Kolby, I expected a Sage replica and he was definitely not! I'm excited to see his little personality to come out. I think he is going to be physical if his movements are any indication. He might fight the swaddle. But, he needs to be able to hold his own in this house. Sage and Kolby are all ready to try out for the tackle football team.

I am also excited to see what his name will be. We have a few ideas but nothing is grabbing both of us. We might just come back to the hospital to finish filling out his birth certificate! Just kidding. Maybe we'll just call this one Boy or Three. Or maybe we should name him SaKo since that is what will probably come out of my mouth most of the time!

Let's chat, it's been way too long!

We are home and with power! We got home yesterday evening after driving home so that they boys could fall asleep in the car.

And as promised, here are our pictures of the Hurricane Damage around our neighborhood. This is our back deck, no damage, just a lot of debris. Sage will be the first to tell you that God protected us. He and Drew had gone around the day Ike was coming and prayed over all our trees asking God to keep them in the ground, off our house and away from our windows. He certainly did!


This is across the street from us.


See how God protected this house too? The tree branches are right against the windows with nothing broken.


And just so you can get an idea of the size...


This is how we passed our first evening with no power, playing Go Fish by lantern!



We were in College Station, home of the Aggies for the weekend. Our good friends, put us up for the weekend after I called them on Friday and invited us to come. She told me they had a busy weekend but would love to have us. It was the best weekend we've had in a long time. They live on the Traditions golf course so we were able to take golf cart rides, Drew hit some balls, we went swimming and ate lunch pool side. Sage and I got to go see their daughter in her play, Cinderella. It was just a really lovely weekend like a mini vacation.

We came home recharged, rested and encouraged. They are a family that we would like to be just like so it is always fun to watch them as a family.

We were without power for a week. And we still know people who are without power. I can't say that it was too awful for us because we stayed with friends almost the entire time.

We headed to Austin last Sunday and the boys and I stayed until Wednesday. Drew met up with his bosses on Tuesday for a meeting in Austin and traveled home with them. For his meeting and also his birthday which was last Sunday, we had to go get him a whole new outfit since he had packed shorts, flip flops, and a clean shirt.

In Austin, we took a train ride, played at a park and ate some yummy food.

We are so thankful to our friends who quickly and graciously took us in. Our week without power was so comfortable and easy, thanks to them! We spent a total of 4 nights in our house without power. The first night was so awfully hot, the next 2 weren't that bad, thanks to the "cold front" of 60's at night and the last one was slightly uncomfortable. We had plenty of water and food and plenty of ways to get more if we needed it. I mean on Thursday the boys and I went to the mall! We didn't have power but the mall did! Priorities. The mall is across the street from the hospital which is why they had power. I was thankful to eat Chick fil A and watch the boys play in the play place.

Moving on from the Hurricane... I am outgrowing my clothes. Pants are no longer comfortable except one pair of gauchos that are not fit for public. They are just really worn out and ugly looking. I have 5 dresses that I wear on a regular basis when leaving the house. 5 dresses, 7 days. And two of them, I have to wear leggings under because they shrunk and are shorter than I prefer to wear dresses. And most of my shirts are a little short and my belly isn't that huge. There are other parts of me that have gotten, um, larger which are causing my pants to not fit.

I love Costco. But why do they put the XXLarge bages of M&M's right next to the register. I was able to justify the purchase by reminding myself that I told Sage that he and I will make M&M cookies together.

And no, M&M's are not the cause of my pants not fitting, the baby growing in my belly is!

We are back to our regularly scheduled week here with Mothers Day Out tomorrow so I will be going to the doctor and the grocery store by myself.

I have more pictures I want to share of my cute kids doing cute things but they will have to wait for another day. And I need to get a picture of my 32 week baby belly!

32 weeks! Yikes. We will paint the baby's room before the end of September. Which means, I need to start taking down the floral border wall paper. I will get all the 0 - 3 month clothes pulled out in October. I will. I promise myself. We did get the car seat, so we really are ready... kind of.

Another update via Mom

Drew went back to Houston on Tuesday to work and then Kristy and the boys went back Wednesday afternoon. It is a bit cooler now so they are just having a "campout" at home. Drew's work building is OK downtown Houston and so he is charging their phones. When I called, she could not receive it "due to the aftermath of the hurricane" but she did get my text and later called me:) THANKS to their Austin friends for their wonderful hospitality and to all of you who are praying - they are all aware of their many blessings in the midst of the storm! Kristy says the rumor is that they will have electricity by Monday night - she will update ASAP! Meanwhile she and the boys hung out at the mall's play place yesterday and may go to the zoo if it is open today....

We Weathered the Storm

So, you all know, we made it! Our house is still standing, no broken windows and we are completely safe.

We traveled to Austin this morning, leaving our house at 6am because it was so hot! Tentatively, we are planning on going back tomorrow as we expect Drew to return to work Tuesday.

I want to record what happened, so this may get lengthy.

Thank you all for your prayers and comments!

Friday night, it seemed Ike just wasn't going to come to land. Not because of what news casters were predicting, he just wasn't coming in. I started to get skeptical thinking this wasn't going to be a big deal at all. I mean, it was a little windy but nothing really.

Around midnight, Drew and I decided to go to bed. As I was brushing my teeth, the power went off for about 30 seconds and then came back on. So something was happening. We had decided to sleep on an air mattress in the boys room for two reasons. I wanted them close. And because there bedroom had the smallest window which we could all stay away from.

At about 2, the power turned off and back on again. Drew went down to check what the tv was saying. Ike was heading our way and had just touched land.

We debated about what to do. We have a closet under our stairwell that we originally thought we would all hang out in. In the middle of the night, it looked very small with two sleeping boys. We decided our upstairs hall was the next best option. We closed all the doors and the queen air mattress fit where our three bedrooms converge. We decided the boys would sleep there and Drew and I would share the remaining space in the hallway. Think long twin but narrower. I laid there for about 10 minutes before I realized that my almost 31 week pregnant self could not handle laying on the floor. The pressure points on my hip and shoulder were already hurting. I decided that I could lay at the bottom of the air mattress below the boys feet. During that time, at 2:45 the power switched off and stayed off.

I slept off and on until 6:26 when Kolby woke up. Drew was up every half hour checking the Doppler on his Blackberry. When Kolby woke up, I took off his long sleeve shirt (he sleeps in long pajamas because he gets cold in shorts and doesn't keep covers on) and told him to lay back down. At about 7, Sage woke up. We chatted about the loud noises he was hearing for the first time. The wind and probably debris landing or hitting our roof.

Through out the night, I would wake up to a loud bang or something. I think it was tree branches hitting our house or roof.

One of our worries or fears was a tree or branch coming through one of our windows. We live in a pretty wooded area and have some large windows. It could have been very scary and very destructive if that would have happened.

We got up and went downstairs. Drew checked the Doppler again and we weren't out of the eye yet so we set up a fortress under the stairs and tried to keep the boys in there, away from our very large windows. We ate breakfast of cereal and pop tarts with a juice box. It was hard to keep the boys in there, partly because neither Drew or I wanted to stay in there. It was really uncomfortable for me to sit or lay in there.

About 8, we decided it was okay to venture out of there. And that began our first day of no power. We listened to our radio that picks up television stations and found out that we are under a water conservation. We were to use water sparingly, no showers, flush as little as possible, use bottled water as much as possible.

Around 11, we went on an adventure. We walked around our neighborhood. It was still raining, so we all used umbrellas which the boys thought was very cool. We had seen out our window, one large branch that had fallen. As we walked, we saw about 6 trees that were uprooted and laying against houses. Miraculously, none of the windows were broken nor structure damaged from what we could see.

We went to check on the bayou by the tennis courts. The bayou was up about 20 feet. It was covering the tennis courts, you couldn't even see where the bayou was supposed to start or end. The pool is disgusting. Filled with all sorts of nastiness and there is a lot of clean up to do.

There was just a lot of tree debris all over, making it hard to walk along the paths or in the street. Especially for little legs like Kolby's!

After seeing what had happened in our neighborhood, we were more grateful that God had protected us. I was also grateful that Ike came at night, it was easy to keep the kids out of harms way (the windows) instead of fighting them all day.

As my mom said, there is supposed to be a "cool front" coming in, it should help with the clean up process and make it bearable to be in the city. And by cool front in Houston standards is 80's during the day and 60's at night. Not too cool to my original Iowa standards but it feels great now!

Our original plan had been to stay until Monday or Tuesday and then the kids and I were going to come to Austin to stay with our friends but we couldn't take the heat! We thought we had tougher skin than we actually do. We slept upstairs in our bedrooms which was our first mistake, in my opinion. We should have set up camp downstairs where it was a little cooler. Sage, Drew and I woke up about every hour and a half needing a drink of water. Kolby slept like a champ and didn't wake up at all. It was just disgusting. I was trying to lay so that no part of my skin had to touch another part of my skin. The best way to do that is on your back and I knew that I shouldn't be sleeping on my back 7 months pregnant. So, I tossed and turned all night. Drew tossed and turned all night. Sage kept coming in our room asking for a drink. We were all pretty tired.

We have decided that we are going to skip our camping trip this year because this has been enough!

I am praying that when by the time we go home tomorrow, the water conservation will be over so we can at least take showers and stay cool that way. Power could be out between 3 days or 4 weeks.

I will check in again when I can with pictures. I forgot my card reader to put them on the internet, sorry! You guys have probably seen more pics than me anyway!

If power continues to stay down, I will continue to move around to various friends houses in Texas. I don't think I am up for an 18 hour drive to Iowa by myself with the boys, but if we enter week 2 or 3 maybe my position will change!

Update via Mom

Just letting everyone know that Kristy called and we talked long enough before we were cut off for me to get the info to post for you: they are all fine!! The storm is slowing and there are lots of small trees and branches down in the neighborhood but their house is standing,unaffected! The boys are "doing great" and slept all night - through all the wind and rain. She did have to remind Sage not to open the refrigerator as we talked! They have a battery radio so are keeping up on the latest news. Two weeks without electricity is the forecast... if they are able, she and the boys will travel out of the area in a couple days. The weather is predicted to continue to be "90 degrees plus the regular humidity" and then a cold front which will be a welcome cooling: "60's at night and 80's in the day" THANK YOU for all your thoughts and prayers! We will update as we hear but for now I am breathing a little easier - she sounded good:)

Specific Prayer

Please pray for our family specifically for obedience from the boys, peace, wisdom and unity.

We've had kind of a hard day with obedience from Sage. I think it is his fear and not knowing what to do with it. We had a family prayer time and I doubt that will be the last!

The hurricane is coming, the official word is that it is really too late to evacuate. It is expected to hit this evening and continue through out the night until 6 or 7am. We are expecting 70 - 80 mile per hour winds. I'm not expecting too much sleep.

I'll post if I can, but I'm not expecting electricity in the morning.

Text messages will be our best form of communication according to the tv. But again, it will be used sparingly.

Nothing *UPDATE with pic of Ike

If you click on the picture and look for the yellow thumb tack, that is where our house is and you can see where Ike is coming. (Thanks Drew for doing this!)

A good link to look at to see where Ike is going is: http://web.tampabay.rr.com/wolfy/

We are about 60 miles inland.

*************************************************************************************

Nothing to report yet. Things are supposed to start happening late afternoon or evening or later.

Right now, it is just a normal day. If I hadn't been watching tv to see what is happening, I wouldn't have a clue anything was brewing. I don't normally watch the news or the weather channel but Drew keeps me informed.

Drew is home from work today, almost the whole city is shut down. Schools, malls, stores, churches. No one wants to get caught I guess.

Drew took the boys swimming this morning. We figure it might be the last opportunity for a couple days. And they needed to get some energy out.

So, we wait. And we try to act like it is normal to have 165 paper plates, 175 paper bowls and an incredible amount of food sitting around your house, with all our canned goods stacked in the refrigerator, and a grill sitting in our dining room.

I'm not so scared of the actual hurricane. Maybe it is because I don't know or completely understand the devastation that can occur.

I am most nervous about living without electricity. A guy at Lowe's who has lived in Houston for 30 years, told Drew to expect 4 - 5 days with no electricity. We are as prepared as we can be for that but it makes me nervous to have no air conditioning or fans in 90 degree heat. Drew and I have talked a little about how long the kids and I will tough it out before packing up and heading to friends. He will have to stay to work. I think our limit is 2 or 3 days. We'll see. And I wonder, how easy will it be to leave? What about flooding?

I have to trust God that he will get us through whatever he has for us. I know he will.

And a random fear, having the baby come early. I've heard about changes in the atmospheric pressure sending moms into labor, I just hope and pray that it doesn't happen to me.

Those are some thoughts swirling in my head. And that I am going to enjoy having the internet while it still works!

If electricity does go out, we only have cell phones so our main point of contacts will be our parents, so if you need to know, call them for updates.

Thanks for all the prayers, comments, and phone calls that we have received.

I'll keep posting until I can no longer!

Ominous

That is the feeling I have had going through out today. It just seems like a normal day and it has been. Except that we have been preparing for a hurricane with 75 mile per hour winds and the possibility of not having electricity.

Part of me feels like it is going to end up being a thunderstorm and all this energy and plans will be for naught. And I will celebrate if that is the case.

Part of me is scared. I don't know what to expect from high winds, what does that mean exactly? Damage will be done but to what extent, where and to whom?

I'm nervous for Sage's reaction. He does fine in thunderstorms but every time we talk about the hurricane or watch something on tv about it, he says there will be lots of rain sos we have to leave!

We're in the no turning back mode now. We are staying until the worst is over and then we'll reevaluate. The kids and I can make it a few days without electricity but if it gets too long, well, we might be rethinking our position.

Last I saw, Ike is supposed to hit tomorrow night about 9pm. I'm prepared for another ominous day tomorrow. With some rain.

And maybe a trip to Target for a few more supplies.

Preparing for Ike

I went shopping at Costco. I can't admit how much I spent. I bought mostly non-perishable food and water. I got a propane tank too. We're mostly concerned with living without electricity for a few days.

Sage is concerned with how he will wash his hands. And he totally voted for leaving.

We're hunkering down and getting ready to hang out as a family. Our church is closed for the weekend, Friday to Sunday. They are going to have one service Sunday night at 6:30.

I'm beat after getting groceries and carrying them all in. I mean it is still 98 degrees with 50% humidity.

Drew is on his way home, but he hit traffic so it could be an hour or more when it is normally 35 minutes.

This post was funnier and more informative in my head and I just can't think through what should be said.

I'll check back when I can!

A Huge Test of Paitence and Kindness

Being woken up four times during my nap today by my four year old.

First time: He measured himself with the tape measurer and needed to show me how tall he is.

Second time: He wanted to be done with rest time and get off the couch.

Third time: He was all sweaty from playing downstairs and the white fans on the wall weren't working (air conditioning vents).

Fourth time: He helped himself to a water bottle from our stash in case of bad weather and that cooled him off. He thought I needed to know. Did I mention that this was the bottled water that sat in the van for a day before I brought it in just two hours before he drank it. I bet it was really refreshing!

Also, the shorts that I bought in June are really tight and uncomfortable. And my shirts don't cover my belly as well. Hello, week 30. And yes, I do need shorts still it is 90 degrees and humid everyday still. I am counting down the days in September, people say it gets nicer towards the end of September. I'll believe it when I feel it.

And my varicose veins! Oh my!

Starbucks

I’ve always been a little envious of people who get to sit in Starbucks sipping something yummy and typing on their laptop. And now, I have entered their ranks.
I sip my white chocolate mocha iced and type this. I know I only have a little over a month to enjoy this phenomenon and then a new little boy will be with me where ever I go. And if he is like my first two, sitting nicely in his car seat while I type away, won’t happen.

But, I have a problem; I don’t know what to type. I can’t think of what to say. Nothing interesting so I think I should write something funny, but even that, I am having a hard time with.

It’s Tuesday again, which means Mothers Day Out. Today has gone smoother, less running around with my head cut off, more getting errands accomplished. But I haven’t really wanted to get them done.

I crossed a few off my list because I just didn’t want to. Nothing important. Nothing life threating. Just looking for things to hang on our walls. Because, again, it probably won’t happen if it doesn’t happen before this baby is born. Or it will just take a year or two longer.

I did buy more water and a package of diapers just in case Ike changes paths again. It doesn’t look like we will get hit, but it won’t hurt to have one more package of bottled water. It won’t go bad.

I also got more paint samples for the baby’s room. Because the plan is to paint in there this weekend. See, the important things are getting done.

The hype for these hurricanes is turning out to be worse than the bite. Rain and wind, I can handle. It is when we start making plans to leave that gets me a little scared. Twice now, we have emailed our friends asking if we can crash with them if need be. Already, we have heard enough stories to know to get out of Dodge if things look bad.

The worst part is that these chairs are kind of uncomfortable.

Now, I’m starting to think I should have gone to the mall to look for a birthday present for Drew, it’s on Sunday and I have zero ideas.

**I'm home now. I even picked the boys up early from MDO. Did you know that 2 year olds take naps and 4 year olds watch videos for a rest at MDO? I kind of feel jipped. I thought we would get home and the kiddos would conk out so I could recover from my morning of errands. Then I had the brilliant idea to go swimming. Except it's Tuesday. I know that means nothing to you, but our pool is closed for super chlorination on Tuesdays. So, my second plan is a dvd. Toy Story for the million and eighth time.

Nap Time

When did your kids give up napping?

I had decided that Sage needed to give his up. When he takes an afternoon nap, he has a hard time falling asleep that night. Like put him to bed at 8, he's still awake when we are going to bed at 10. And then for some reason, he'll wake up earlier the next day, around 6:30.

So today, I told him he didn't have to take a nap but rest on the couch while looking at books while I napped upstairs.

I came down after an hour and fifteen minutes. He was asleep on the couch. He rolled off the couch, wanted to lay back down and fell asleep again. He slept until 4:30.

That means he'll fall asleep around 11. And wake up around 5. Oh, I exaggerate, a little.

But tomorrow, we will not take naps! Well, he won't. I hope.

5 Hours

When I first signed the boys up for Mothers Day Out and realized I would have 5 hours to myself, to do with what I pleased, I was nervous, guilty, and excited. I had grand plans. Plans of no more grocery trips with two boys, no more Target trips with two boys, the gym, taking time to look at decorating stores, and maybe a pedicure or two, you know before the baby comes, after it is hard to reach my feet.

And then yesterday happened. And I realized how quickly 5 hours can pass.

Drop off boys.
Chat with another mom, leave at 9:20.
Drive to Target.
Get what is on my list plus some Little Debbie's. Browse in shoes and maternity.
Drive home.
Check email, read a few blogs.
Write a post.
Fold laundry.
Change laundry.
Make dinner menu.
Write grocery list.
Drive to grocery store.
While driving, make a few phone calls.
Get groceries.
Drive through Chick fil A. (I was starving, it was 12:30!)
Drive home.
Carry in groceries.
Unpack freezer and fridge stuff.
Leave rest for later.
Shovel in fries with ketchup.
Drive to Hobby Lobby.
Return something at Hobby Lobby.
Go to pick up boys.

5 hours. Gone, just like that. The necessary stuff got done and nothing more.

I am going to admit that I judged the mothers who put their kids in MDO, two days a week. What do they do with all that time? I wondered. Now I know. Just enough to make it feel worthwhile.

And I didn't finish unpacking the groceries or folding laundry until later that evening, I was exhausted.

Today

I'm alone in my house. It is quite strange knowing that no one will walk through the front door shattering my quiet house.

Today is the first day of Mothers Day Out. I have 5 glorious hours to do with what I want. Okay, need to do. I have already been to Target. I need to make my grocery list and head to the grocery store then hopefully a couple of stores I hate taking my kids to, but need to get to for some decorating stuff.

It's exciting stuff, let me tell you. The boys were so excited to go, Sage kept asking me if we could leave. And they were so proud to carry their new lunch boxes.

I forgot my camera so I ran back in the house to get it, so you get to see them buckled into car seats.


Standing in front of the church entrance.

28/29ish Week Belly Pic

For those of you who care, this was taken in our master bedroom, not outside. We have a little deck that is yet to be used because it is so stinkin hot here. We think someday, it will be a really nice place to sit.

My appointment on Monday and ultra sound showed everything to be on track and looking good. I had to take the boys with my so I didn't enjoy the ultrasound very much and also, the baby wasn't too into having his picture taken. She said his size looks great for a November 16 due date. The doctor was in and out because one of his patients was in labor so he was seeing me before he went to deliver her. So, not much face time, like seriously, 3 minutes.

I did get a tour scheduled for the hospital. A whole month before my due date!

I feel him move and kick a lot more, it makes me excited to meet this new little guy! I think we are going to have a list of names we like and then pick after we meet him. Hopefully, we'll be able to choose faster than Karoline! I am not feeling any more ready, his room is still in shambles, no car seat, no crib mattress. But at the same time, we have a bassinet, and I can get newborn diapers pretty easily. So, I guess after we get a car seat, maybe I'll chill out.

I am waiting for my nesting phase to set in. I have zero motivation to paint his room or get it ready and zero motivation to paint our entryway and hallway (which is our project for this weekend).

I am also quite sore from bowling last evening. It hurts to walk. I should have known since it doesn't feel all that great to walk on a normal day but I was determined.

Off, to finish taping and start painting trim!

Situation

Situation: Sage knocked Kolby down. (This happens 8,000 times a day) Kolby cries. (This happens 8 million times a day)

I say: Kolby, are you okay, did you get hurt?

Kolby, nodding and saying yeah, me asking where? Him reaching around to his butt and saying "Buuu."

I laughed out loud.

Situation: Boys playing in the living room, me working in kitchen.

I hear: "Kolby, say Dear Jesus." "De Jesus" (except you totally can't understand Jesus) "You are in heaven." Kolby babbles something. "I can't get to heaven without you." Kolby babbles something else. "Amen." "Men!"

Situation: Getting Sage ready for his nap.

I ask: "Is there anything you want to talk about, Sage?"

He says: "Well, I just didn't want to go to fireworks because everyone would eat all our cupcakes." (We took cupcakes to the place we watched fireworks from and shared them with a bunch of people, that was the intended plan.)

Situation: Kolby sitting on Drew's lap in the drivers seat of the van.

Kolby: "Vroooomm." flashing us a huge grin.

Back to Life, Back to Reality

Last week I got to go home. Home to where I grew up, to visit my parents, sister and best friend. By myself. I didn't drag my two sweet boys with me. I rode on a plane by myself. Do you know how nice that is? I read two books, a magazine and did some Bible study.

I got home Sunday night. And Monday morning was back to reality as Kolby came in to wake me up. And I remembered that I had to take both boys with me to the doctors visit where I have to drink the orange soda and wait for an hour. And have an ultrasound. I had tried to find a sitter, it just didn't work out.

They did great. Except for when Sage hit Kolby because Kolby hit Sage accidentally while swinging the magna doodle around. While I was getting the ultrasound. She told me I needed to relax. The baby looks great, he is a good size and she saw another peek that he is indeed a he. He didn't look at us too much and quite honestly, I just wanted to get out of there before the boys destroyed something or each other.

We were on our way to Chick-fil-A as a reward for behaving so well and then I saw USA Baby and thought we could just pop in for a quick look at car seats. It didn't go as well as the doctor visit but we didn't destroy anything.

And then I spent a lot of the afternoon on the phone trying to figure out how much it costs for Kolby to see a Ponsetti certified doctor since he isn't on our insurance plan. I still don't know if we would have to pay for the shoes or if insurance would cover them. They are $400 shoes so it is kind of a big deal. Frustrating process.

I will get back to more exciting things when more exciting things happen. For now, this is life.

I've got baby on my mind

Last night I pre-registered for the hospital and found out that there are no open tour dates before my due date. I quickly sent them an email and pleaded my case, we'll see what happens. I am not holding out too much hope, if worse comes to worse, I'll just go and walk around by myself and ask my doctor a lot of questions! I don't even know if I labor, deliver, recover and stay in the same room or if I get moved. With Sage, it was all in one room and with Kolby, I was moved after delivery to a different floor even!

During Kolby's tour, we learned that if they pick up the red phone, that is a bad sign. Guess what? They called on the red phone right after Kolby was delivered. He had some fluid or something, he wasn't breathing the greatest. And then he was. And then they wanted to keep him in the nursery to keep an eye on him. I cried. And then he got sent to the NICU. I cried some more. It ended up not being that big of a deal, although it delayed his circumcision to literally right before we were discharged.

Thinking back to Kolby's birth and then care afterwards. It is no wonder I was so depressed. I didn't even think through things, just went through the motions.

So, Kolby was in the NICU, they told me I couldn't go down between the hours of 7 and 11 am because that is when the doctors do their rounds. But I needed to speak to the doctor because Kolby was born with clubfoot and we were very clueless as to what that meant and how or where to begin with treatment. You learn fast as a parent, huh? So, he was in the NICU, I was in the recovery room one floor up, we still hadn't lived in New Haven for a year and guess how many visitors I got? One. The young marrieds pastor from our church. I was pretty lonely. And Drew wasn't able to hang out with me much because we had a 20 month old that needed to be looked after.

During this, they weren't too clear (read: never discussed) on how I was to nurse him. I think they gave him a bottle once and then I asked about nursing and pumping. Then they brought me a pump and them told me that I could just go down to nurse him. He wasn't too thrilled with the idea by then. But the next time, while sitting with a lactation consultant, he was perfect.

Then, I had to take Kolby in for his couple day old check up and of course they wanted to weigh him again in a couple days. It worked out as I had to take him that same day to get his first set of cast for his clubfeet. At first the doctor was like, oh just pop over right after he gets his casts on. I looked at them confused and said but then, you won't know how much weight he gained because his casts will add weight for sure. Right. Wow. And this was at Yale Hospital!

And I don't even want to get in to the details of the clubfoot appointment. It was one of the worst doctor experiences I've had. Let's just say, we didn't go back and recommended others not to either. I am convinced that if we had stayed with that doctor, Kolby's feet would be in worse shape because of it, he might not even be able to walk normally.

Maybe I will tell the tale of Kolby and his club feet. I don't think I've done that yet. Keep coming back for more exciting posts from me!

Sage's Baby Names Ideas

1. Wall-E- from the movie

2. Toby Mac or Toby- the Christian singer

3. Lars- from the book Little Polar Bear

4. Boston- like the Red Sox

Boston is his number one choice. If either of us suggests anything else, he reminds us that Boston is the baby's name.

We have no idea what to name this baby, our third boy. We named Sage because we like the meaning, which is wise and we named Kolby after the little boy that I nannied for in college.

Both of our boys were named late in the game, like a week or so before delivery. I know we'll figure it out, I just don't know how. And with both the boys we were confident in other names before we really named them.

With Sage, he was going to be Ian for most of the pregnancy. Kolby was going to be Cael. Neither of those names have been suggested this pregnancy.

We are open to ideas. We would kind of like a different beginning letter than what we have and it can't be too normal.

By asking your ideas, I am trying to not buy a baby name book. I've heard of The Baby Name Wizard, I am just reluctant to buy another name book.

And, I realized this afternoon that I am beginning week 27, the start of my third trimester and we are so not prepared. At. All.

Our goal was/is to have our house all painted before the baby comes. That would also suggest that we need to decide on a color for his room and for the entry/hallway. But, I did find bedding for the crib and have an idea in mind for the queen bed that will be in his room too. Right now, his room is pink with a floral border.

And a car seat. And a crib mattress. And small cloth diapers. And some bottles, just in case. And some pacifiers, definitely.

So, if I go to 40 weeks, we have 13 left, but because with the boys I went to 38, I am guessing we have about 11 weeks.

Sounds doable. I hope the nesting instinct sets in fast and furious.

And have you seen this post?!

MckMama's baby Stellan got his miracle!

His heart is beating normally. It's a miracle. God is good!

I have many thoughts swirling around regarding this. I knew God could do this if he wanted to. It just seems like in so many instances, for whatever reason, God doesn't do the miracle we pray for. He answers prayer in many ways, I know that. And I know that just because we ask for a certain thing doesn't mean we will get it.

I needed this miracle. I needed to know that God is still a God of miracles. I needed to see him perform. And he did. In a mighty way, a way that medical science cannot explain.

Psalm 126:3 The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy.

Lesson in Lying

Sage is a liar and a sinner. I knew that. But now I know that.

This morning, I've been working at my desk clipping coupons, going through a stack of papers. He was standing next to me talking to me. I had to go to the bathroom and said don't touch anything, it's really messy over here.

I came back. The scissors and coupons were scattered on the floor.

I questioned him if he touched my stuff. He shook his head and said "Bo did it."

I knew that Bo didn't do it, I could hear him right outside the bathroom door driving his car up and down the door. I knew he was lying.

I asked him again to tell me the truth. Did you do it? He said "Oh, I forgot, I did touch it."

I said "Come over by me and look me in the eyes. Did you lie to mommy or did you forget?"

"Forgot."

"Sage, your sins will find you out, if you are lying to mommy, God knows and you need to ask him for forgiveness for lying."

As he walks back into the living room "God, sorry for lying to mommy." as he chuckles just a little.

Do you ever feel...

like you should write something but aren't sure what to write?

I think it's called writers block.

So, today you get a summary of our time in our new city thus far.

A couple weeks ago, I felt like I didn't know where home was. I can't say that I feel at home yet, but I am getting there. I think it is partly because fall is coming (well, to some parts of the country, we'll see fall in about January). But with fall, it means school starts! So, school isn't starting for our little family quite yet. But, it means a schedule, not a week looming in front of me with only swimming lessons to take up some time. I am excited and nervous about our new schedule.

On Tuesdays, both boys are going to Mothers Day Out from 9 - 2. Those are the days that I plan to grocery shop, Target runs and my doctor appointments. On one hand, I wonder if it won't be enough time and on the other, I wonder what I am going to do to fill my time. In my short career as a mother, I have never had 5 hours every week with no children to do what I want or need to do. Quite frankly, I am nervous, excited and already feel a little guilty. And totally blessed. Mothers Day Out isn't in every part of the country, ya know!

Every other Wednesday, we'll go to MOPS! I didn't think we would get to do it, but we do. And, if I want to leave the kids in the childcare until 2 on that day, it costs me $4 per child. That is child care for $2 an hour per child! Can you believe it! Considering that I pay our 14 year old sitter (whom we love) $7 to $8 an hour!

Thursdays, we will go to Community Bible Study. The boys will go to child care while I go to Bible study. I am pretty excited to have an in depth study again.

This brings me to my new schedule. I have started to get up earlier than the boys in the morning! Shocking. I know. If you know me at all, you know I love to sleep and do not love getting up in the morning. We are trying something new. The boys get up to an alarm. It is set for 7:20am. My alarm is set for 6:15. I have time to eat breakfast with Drew, read my Bible and do a little study and maybe get a shower. I am thinking I should set it for 6 because that shower is going to start to become very valuable.

Here is why I like it: it gives me time to collect my thoughts and be by myself. If I get a shower, it takes away the morning tv watching. I actually get my Bible study done.

And these new activities excite me because it means meeting new people! And, hopefully, people who live close(r) to me. I have met some really nice women, but they live in the suburbs.

I am also slightly nervous about all this because I'm having a baby in November. Nothing like a newborn to mess with a schedule! Newborns make their own schedule, but I am hoping to fit him into ours. If that makes sense.

But that is a whole different post.

Throw in a little schooling, crafts, health club and swimming and I think our weeks will be quite busy. And quite exciting!

Thanks for reading, if you actually read the whole thing. I know it is boring to some, but I feel like we are getting things figured out!

Next up: Costco vs. Sams Club

Just kidding. I think.

Thoughts Flowing Through my Head

Does it really matter if Sage doesn't go to preschool at age 4?

A director of a preschool told me today that I would be doing him a disservice by not putting him in a school until age 5.

I disagree.

I found a preschool that is $290 a month and has a spot open. It is everyday from 9 am to noon.

I am nervous that with a baby due in November, taking him to preschool everyday would be quite overwhelming. Am I a wimp?

I think I can put Sage and Kolby in Mothers Day Out from 9 to 2 on Tuesdays, do MOPS on every other Wednesday and then Community Bible Study on Thursday mornings. And it would save us money.

Oh, and we would do some school at home too.

I need some more systems and organization for our daily routines.

I feel kind of silly for saying that.

In my mind, I can be super mom.

It makes me tired to think about it.

That is why I need a system or a schedule.

I don't like doing crafts with the boys. Am I bad mom for admitting that?

I end up doing the whole craft myself. Because they don't put enough glue or do it the way I think it should be done.

Control much?! I'm working on it. The sad thing is, I stink at crafts, they would probably do a better job.

I am scared to do school at home.

I feel inadequate. And like I don't have the patience.

Here's a picture of the boys wearing the craft they, I mean I, made at the library yesterday.



Here's how Kolby preferred to wear it.