Monday, October 31, 2005


My bloginality personality is ISTJ. Unfortunatly, I don't get how to copy the link so that you can click on it and go see what yours is!

Go there and see what you are!


Weight: 149
Babies Heartbeat: 120

I gained 2 lbs. in the last month. That gives me hope that I won't gain as much this time as I did with Sage (40 lbs.). But I am skeptical also because I remember putting more weight on in the second trimester so I guess next visit will be an indicator. I am definitly not eating healthier!

Sage slept through the night last night! But today, I didn't give him a morning nap and now his afternoon nap, he has been yelling for 15 minutes now. I am not too hopeful for an afternoon nap. On the way to my appointment, he fell asleep in the car for about 5 minutes and I was hoping he wouldn't consider that his nap, but....

Drew is busy with school again this week. He has a big project for Wed. and then a 15 page paper due next week. He isn't even going to come home for dinner tonight and that is very unusual.

Sage and I are going to a Fall Festival party through church tonight. I am going to help and hand out candy or something, I don't remember. At least we have something to do since we won't look forward to Drew coming home.

I will try to post Halloween pics tomorrow!

Sunday, October 30, 2005

Correction and Admittal

Correction: Yesterday, Sage did not sleep in the afternoon. Bed time, he whined for 30 minutes, cried hard for five and fell asleep. I was up at 3 with him after letting him cry for 10 minutes then going in and comforting him and he cried for 10 more minutes. Have I ever mentioned that 10 minutes of crying is magical for Sage. If he cries for more than 10 minutes, chances are he isn't stopping but usually, right at 10 minutes he will stop. It is so weird and it is always at 8 minutes that I have to tell myself to be strong, give him 2 more minutes, it just might work.

Admittal: Did I mention the new noise machine that I had bought for Sage and set on the wind setting during all naps and bedtime instead of the fan? Today, we came home from church (a 5 minute drive) and Sage was cashed in the car, Drew got him out, he was asleep in his shoulder, I came in turned on said noise machine and Drew laid him down, Sage stood up and cried. We were perplexed. How could he be so tired and be so asleep and then so instantly awake. Drew went in to comfort him and immediatly Sage was asleep on his shoulder. Laid him down and was immediatly standing and screaming. A few more minutes passes and I say hey lets try turning off the noise machine. Drew goes in and turns it off and comforts, a few minutes of crying and then SILENCE for an hour and a half! Amazing! Now, I feel awful for having played said noise machine in the first place. But, we are crossing our fingers and hoping that we can continue the sleeping in silence. Crazy idea.

Now, to get through these night wakings... and have I mentioned my new idea to keep him dry at night? I use size 5 Huggies Overnights on him and then put a washable diaper on top of that. It worked last night so I hope it continues to work. Plan B is to buy every brand of diaper on the market and go with the one that works at night! I'll evaluate each brand if it works overnight or not. Exciting reading!

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Can we get some sleep here?

Yesterday, Sage took 0 naps. 0. Big. Fat. 0. And last night he woke up twice. Once at 2:15 and then at 5:15. I didn't let him cry it out because when we put him to bed he seemed to be getting a cold. At 2:15, I gave him more Tylenot Cough and Cold and a bottle and change the diaper. I thought we were golden until at least 7. 5:15am he starts crying, I give him 10 minutes no settling back down. I change his diaper again and then think, fine another bottle but only 4oz this time. He downs the 4 oz and is mad that the bottle is empty, fine another 4 oz. He signs all done, I lay him down, he cries for 5 minutes. It is 5:50am by this time. Elephant girl gets up above us. I hear her walking around her room and then get in the shower. 6:30, Sage starts crying. I get up all pissy because Drew hasn't helped yet. I pray for patience with Sage and mess with him until 7:50. I got him back to sleep twice but as soon as I lay him down, he stands up in his crib and cries. So frustrating. I have been awake since 5:15 and had trouble sleeping between 3 and 5:15 anyway. I go back to our room, Sage is still crying and has been since 7:28 when I laid him down. Drew and I talk, he says I need to ask for help because he knows that I want to let Sage cry for a little bit and he doesn't know how long etc. I say he can at least let me know he is willing and awake and ask what we are going to do. That is settled and I had prayed about my attitude while rocking Sage sitting on the floor of his room. (If I go to the LR and sit in the comfy black leather rocking recliner, he gets mad and tugs on my shoulders to stand up) And I needed a lot of prayer! Drew got up with him and let me sleep 2 more hours! Sage cried for an hour and a half while not sleeping during his morning nap. Maybe I should just give up on the morning nap. I guess it is possible it is time for him to drop that. So, when do I shower?

On a happy note, he did fall asleep for his afternoon nap! I pray tonight goes better. He has been coughing and sneezing today also. And I am just tired.

Friday, October 28, 2005

Getting things done

Yesterday, Sage and I stayed home and cleaned the apartment. I got a lot done and I feel like I have gotten a lot done today. We went to Baby Catalog Outlet store and Sage and I tried all the double strollers that I wanted! He was so good getting put from one to another and me trying the car seat in the stroller. It made him happy to hold my purse and chew the strap. Kate Spade is good for something! I am still in a quandry about which one to get. I have heard not to get the side by side because you can't fit in any stores. I have heard not to get a front and back seater because they are hard to push and you can't see the front child. And price plays a large factor in my decision making process. I found one that I really like but it is a brand that is unknown to me. Compass. It is an umbrella style front and back seater and weighs only 23lbs. I want see it folded up because it also needs to fit in my trunk and leave room for other things. Like what if we want to go on a trip and take the stroller and we have luggage and 2 kids in car seats makes things a bit tight in our small Saturn. I couldn't fold it because of lack of hands. Drew, Sage and I will go back sometime. Price is great at $160. The Graco Duoglider comes in at $180 and was a lot longer and the weight isn't listed which probably means HEAVY! Side by sides, the clear winner would be the Mclaren twin traveler at, hold your breath people, $299 and that is the cheapest I have heard. But it seems like there is not enough room for Sage's shoulders and he is only going to get bigger. Funny because I have seen these out and about and never thought that the kids looked scrunched in them and Sage isn't huge, a little above average but not much.

Sage isn't taking morning naps anymore. He talks, cries, whines the whole time he is in there. Today was the third day like that. Afternoon naps aren't going much better. An hour at best and this afternoon is looking like nil. I thought he was asleep but he just started crying again. What is the deal?! Frustrating because I need time to myself and if he doesn't sleep, he is going to be grouchy! Mostly because of the grouchy factor. Part of this nap problem might be because I didn't turn on the fan in his room. I bought a noise machine and turned the wind noise on. I am hoping this works because it is just too cold to run his fan. He also wakes up at night, probably because he is cold. Now that we don't run air conditioners in our rooms, I am starting to notice how much you can hear in this apartment. Everything. A human elephant lives upstairs. No joke. I don't know how much louder one person can walk! I think she wakes up Sage in the morning like right before 7. I think that because he wakes up crying and he was waking up and just talking to himself and playing with his aquarium.

Too many random things. This post probably only makes sense to me.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Getting Bigger!

Sage, not my belly. We went to his 15 month check-up this morning and he weighed in at 25 lbs 9 oz and was 32 and 3/8 inches tall! 75th percentile for weight and 60th for height. Exactly the same as last time so he is growing perfectly! He got two shots but only whined through them didn't really full out cry. He isn't really talking yet and the doctor didn't seem too worried but said if he isn't talking by 18 months, we should have him evaluated. He does say dada consistently and he was saying ball but he hasn't said that in a while. Sometimes it sounds like he is trying to imitate us when we say all done. He does hear and understand because if we say "do you want to take a bath?" He walks to the bathroom and he usually follows me if I say "Sage, follow mommy". And he can point to his foor and nose and sometimes he will get mouth and head too. But he won't do it all the time.

Can I get a day off? I mean a day where I don't have to cook, clean, wash dishes, do the laundry, or be responsible for someone else. This mom thing is a super full time job with little breaks. And sometimes, I just want to pee without saying no, don't unroll the toilet paper.

I'm tired today. Sage woke up around 3 but I decided to give him 10 minutes to go back to sleep by himself and he did! He wasn't crying like he was scared or a hard cry just kind of yelling. Normally, I would have gotten him right away and given him some milk but I really want to break that habit. It is bad for his teeth and he doesn't need those extra calories in the middle of the night. And I really don't want him getting up in the middle of the night. I really don't think I can handle getting up with 2 kids! Anyway, I am tired because I had such a hard time falling asleep and then falling back asleep after Sage woke up. Partly because I was sure he would wake up and cry out again. So, it kind of felt like I just laid there until 5 when Drew's alarm went off. And then I went back to sleep until 7:30, laid there until 10 to 8 when I decided to shower for the day before Sage got up since he had his dr. appt.

Well, I need to do something productive, like pay bills!

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

It's a....


So, I was totally wrong. I have been wrong with both babies so far so next time I will know it is the opposite of whatever I think it is! I have to admit to a little disappointment. But later as I thought about it, I reminded myself that he looks healthy and all his parts are in place and that is the most important thing. I could have been coming home from that appointment because they saw a potential problem. I should have been coming home rejoicing that he looks healthy, is on track developmentally and icing on the cake should have been that they were able to see the sex and now I will have two boys!

I had to change my attitude and my way of thinking. I have to do that a lot! And I will be returning all the baby girl clothes I bought! I will have to look through Sage's stuff and see what sizes and seasons I need to fill in.

Now, we have the difficulty of deciding on a name. We had such a hard time with Sage. I don't ask for peoples opinions because frankly, I don't care. It is my kid and you won't say one mean thing about his name after he is here but you might before he is born.

Sage is in a wierd stage of sometimes needing a morning nap and sometimes not. Today I laid him down at 9 and he still isn't asleep at 10. He isn't crying more just whining, yelling sometimes. Crazy kid.

Random clothing thoughts: I have discovered why I dont' like my clothes. It is because I buy cheap clothes. I look at cute shirts for $20 and then see long sleeve t-shirts that are 2 for $20 and will buy those. Therefore, I don't have that many dress up clothes and always look/feel like a slob. And having been nursing/pregnant, that makes me buy cheap clothes because I know that it is only a phase and if I am not nursing at this time next year, I will need a smaller size. It is such a hard place to be in life! Hopefully, someday, we will have some money that I can buy decent clothes and will be done with childbearing and can buy clothes that will last more than 2 years!

Saturday, October 22, 2005

I'm so bad

I bought some baby girl clothes. I know, I know, we don't know what we are having yet but I was at Baby Gap outlet (25 minutes away and only because I had driven a friend to a counseling session and had to kill time) and the deals were unbelievable! The most expensive thing that I bought was $5.97 and I know from working at the Gap that when things are priced at .97, they aren't getting any cheaper. And I got onesie shirts for $1.97 and matching pants for $3.97 and now, I am bidding on girl clothes on ebay. I am so bad! I am probably jinxing myself and for sure we are having a boy! Oh, well.

What is the deal with pregnant women not wanting to wear maternity clothes? I am 18 weeks, about 4 months along and want to wear my maternity jeans because they are more comfortable. No buttons digging into my stomach, no pants falling so low that I am always hiking them up... So I gave in and wore them to a MOPS meeting. Then I felt dumb because 1) I am not that big yet and 2) there were 2 other preggers there, farther along than me and not wearing maternity clothes yet. So, today I went back to my jeans that are a size too big normally but they fall low and I constantly am jacking them back up. Drew, Sage and I went to run errands and it is raining and they got so wet that I had to change into comfy sweats when we got home. My point of this rambling is why do pregnant women, who would be more comfortable and look pregnant instead of a little bit large, not wear maternity clothes?!

Wednesday, October 19, 2005


What does being a mother mean to you? Being a mother means to me being a person who is a caregiver, who is there emotionally, physically, spiritually, politically for her children, being a person who is dedicated to raising a child, teaching them right from wrong, offering unconditional love, being a living example and a friend. These are not easy things. These are not things that come naturally. Love, that is the easy part. The first time you see your newborn baby you fall in love faster and harder than you ever have before. I don't have to work at loving my son, it just happens, every minute of every day. But the other stuff, I have to work at. He is now at an age where he needs discipine. I don't want to discipline him. It is hard and no fun. But, if I don't teach him not to touch the oven because it is hot, who will? Or worse, he will find out on his own and end up hurt. I am not a compassionate person but I need to show compassion towards Sage. When he hurts himself or is sick, I need to show him that I love him by how I care for him. I didn't love cleaning up his puke, in fact, it made me puke! But I would never let him sleep in a bed with puke in it!

Spirituality is hard. I believe in Jesus. I believe he died for my sins, was buried and rose again! Hallelugah! But teaching Sage that God commands us to obey and love him is hard. I am reading a book Everyday Talk that helps me learn how to teach Sage about God and His love for us. It has taught me that the things that I talk about everyday with my kids when I mean to and more when I don't, mean to be talking to them, those are the things they are going to learn from me. I want my kids to learn the importance of the Bible, it is God's Word given to us to guide us through life. I want them to know that I always look to the Bible for answers. I always look to see what God says on a certain subject. I want them to hear me praising God. I want them to hear me talking good of other people. It sure makes me think twice when I call another driver stupid!

I think being a mother is the hardest job in the world. Harder than being the President of the United States! If we don't raise our kids well... what is going to happen to the world?

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Don't know...

I don't know what to do with Sage when I lay him down for his nap, he talks to himself for 30 minutes and then cries for an hour. I just gave him a bottle (yes, in the middle of the day!) to see if that would calm him down. It doesn't seem to have done any magic trick. I know he needs a nap. Or by the time dinner comes around, there will be a complete meltdown.

I don't know what to do with Sage when I am trying to fix dinner and he holds onto my legs and cries to be picked up. Distracting him with toys doesn't work, not even his own cupboard in the kitchen works! This doesn't happen all the time, just the last two nights in particular. And Drew isn't home yet because I am trying to have dinner ready when he gets home or a few minutes after so that he can get back to school as quickly as possible. (Midterms this week - should be better after tomorrow.) But I do like to have dinner mostly ready so that we have as much family time as we can before Sage goes to bed.

I bought a gallon of milk yesterday at the grocery store. Drew started to drink it for dinner. And said yuck. He checked the expiration, it read Oct. 3! Why is it on the shelves?! I will now be checking my expiration dates on my milk.

I put Sage's new slippers on him this morning and he was pretty fascinated. I told him they are slippers. Later, I asked him if he showed Daddy his new slippers and he lifted up his foot and pointed! This morning, I wanted him to stay in the living room with me while I read the Bible so I put the gate up. After I was done, I was sitting in my chair and said "Okay, Sage now we can leave the living room." Before I got up or anything, he walked over to the gate and waited for me to move it! I am amazed at how smart he is!

Well, he is still crying so my bottle trick was a no go. I guess I won't try that again. I guess we will go to plan b, no ironing for me and we'll just go to Target instead!

Friday, October 14, 2005

Our Family

I thought I would post a picture of our family. This was taken in June, so a little old. And yes, I have gum in my mouth.

Why is it when I finally decide to do something other than cleaning or blogging during Sage's nap, he cries for an hour and a half? Yesterday, I decided to work on his baby album while he slept. I got three pages done and was irritated the entire time because he wouldn't go to sleep. He was so tired. Maybe I waited too long to lay him down. I don't know but the rest of the day was miserable for both of us. My patience was low to start the day and then he doesn't nap and then he is whiny and wants to be picked up and put down the rest of the day. I became the mother I don't want to become. He would be naughty and open a cupboard and I would yell at him. Yell. Don't like that. Don't want to become that. And it didn't work anyway.

It has been raining here since Saturday. We have already been to the mall once this week for lunch but we are going again. There is a little playland that he likes to walk around in and sit in the car. It boils down to me needing to leave the house. The one friend that I have here is in Texas, visiting family so I haven't gotten out too much this week. Monday and Tuesday I stayed busy, Wednesday we were low key because I was worried he would puke again and yesterday was normal but we never left the house. Probably why we were both grouchy when Drew got home.

I watched Beauty Shop last night. Pretty dumb. I thought it would be funny but it just wasn't. Last week I watched Fever Pitch and laughed a lot. It was pretty funny. I tend to watch more movies now that we have Netflix and Drew is rarely home in the evenings.

Well, this was pretty random and boring. Sorry about that. Anyone have ideas for what we should wear for our first family portrait? Something classy but that doesn't scream Christmas. Maybe black shirts and jeans? But Sage and I are pretty pale. I already ruled out white because of that. Definitly a solid color. Maybe I will go to Old Navy and find something matching.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

A small rant

S and I went to the mall yesterday to get a baby gift. Anyway, they have this nice new parking garage and they have 4 reserved spaces for patrons who are expecting and who have stollers. I happen to fall into both categories so I gladly parked there. When I was leaving, a man pulled into one of said spots (with no car seat to be seen) and parked there. I am pretty sure that he wasn't expecting either. It really bugs me that people who clearly have no business parking there park! I mean people like me have to go to a lot of work to get to the mall (this happens at the grocery store too) and am so thankful for a close parking spot. Where do they get off just jumping out of there car and worrying about no one but themselves. I get out of the car, pop the trunk, set up the stroller, close the trunk, get the diaper bag and my purse into the stroller basket, get S unhooked from his car seat and strapped into the stroller all the while trying to remember where I put my keys so I don't lock them in the car! And I have to remember to lock all the doors that I have unlocked. (Cheap car- don't ask)

So, yesterday I made lasagna for dinner and we had a friend over for dinner whose wife is out of town. S eats normally and eats well and then starts acting really tired and kind of cranky. I put him in the tub and give him his bottle and then go to lay him down in his dark room, when he pukes. I turn the light on and he pukes again. D has already left to go back to school to work so I grab my phone and call him to come back. I get S out of his pukey pajamas and start to clean the sheet out. My sister had told me you have to clean out the chunks, they don't magically disappear in the washer! So, as I am cleaning out the sheet, I start puking in the kitchen sink! D walks in the midst of this, hands me the dish washer tub and sends me to the bathroom because the sink is backing up. So gross. He deals with the sink then bleaches the heck out of it. I put clean jammies on S and we put clean sheets on his bed. Dishes need to be washed and a load of laundry needs to be started. D washes the dishes as I rock S. I start the laundry when D is done with the dishes. Remember our portable washer hooks up to the kitchen sink? We get all that done and I keep rocking S and at 9 decide to lay him down again. I have tried and failed previously. He cries for 10 minutes but he was acting fine. He didn't even want to be rocked, he just wanted to walk around and play. At 10:30 when I am wanting to go to bed, I go check on him and as I open the door, he stands up in his crib. So, I get him. And try to bring him to bed with me. He is having none of that. He won't even let me sit or rock. He keeps pointing and signing please. I have no idea what he wants. Finally, I give him some water and make him wait 1o minutes between drinks. At 11:11 I decide he needs to go to bed. He is playing with cars while sitting on my lap which involves dropping them where he has to wriggle around to get them and then dropping them in the same place again. He screams for 1 minute and then stops. I call D who was back at school by 9 and tell him to check him when he gets home. D gets home at 1, checks S who wakes up. D tries to comfort him and ends up giving him a couple ounces of milk to calm him down and get him to go back to sleep. He told me this in my sleepiness and I sit straight up in bed and freak out. I am like, he is going to puke again and we don't have any more sheets for his bed. (No dryer) D apologizes over and over and says he will get up in a few hours and check on him. I wake up at 4, needing to pee, so check on S who is sleeping peacefully with no puke around him. I go back to bed, S wakes up around 7 and starts talking and then falls back asleep until 8:30. I also sleep until 8:30. He is now taking a nap, and has had a piece of toast for breakfast with water. And is acting completly normal. I think I will stick with water today and bland foods.

Monday, October 10, 2005

First Picture!

Remember how Sage grabbed my glass of Diet Coke off the desk the other day? Well, now he just wants the cans. This is what he does while I make dinner.

Today was such a busy day! I did 2 loads of laundry, cleaned half the bathroom, swiffered 3/4 of the apartment, ironed 13 shirts, went to Wal-Mart, Lowes, Sam's Club and Best Buy. Needless to say, we had leftovers for dinner! And I finally figured out how to post pictures which was very easy!

I read R and kether's blog and they were talking about having the wants. I totally understand. We have been married 3 years are due with our second child in March and live in a 2 bedroom apartment. I was thinking yesterday that it is actually nice not owning a home becaues I can't paint any walls or really decorate anything which saves us money. And I can't think about it either which I know would consume a lot of my thoughts. Not that I don't get the wants. I was just trying to think about the positives of my situation. And really I have a great life. I am able to stay home with S and do things that I like to do like cleaning, running errands and sometimes cooking (okay I don't always like to do those things) but they are things that you can see are done and are easy tasks to do. More on this subject later. S needs me!

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Random happenings

Sage slept unitl 9:10am this morning! It was amazing. Drew and I slept unitl 8:30. Sage was up in the night however around 3:30. I gave him a bottle and he went back to sleep. At 6, he cried out for 2 minutes and then not a peep until 9:10! And I am going to have a newborn?! Just when it is getting so good!

Yesterday morning Sage and I went to a MOPS group. It took 25 minutes to drive there but there are about 50 women signed up and about 30 were there. I saw moms who looked to be around my age but didn't get to meet them. Sage did great in the nursery and that always makes me feel good. I did get a phone number of a mom who said I should come over for lunch or something. She has a 5 month old boy. Then there was a message on me cell phone from a friend who was coming to town to go to Ikea and could I meet her. So, we jumped back in the car and went to Ikea for lunch. I never knew there Swedish meatballs were so yummy! Sage liked them too! So we had a fun day.

I have had a headache for the last 3 days but today it seems better. I am drinking a ton of water. And baths help a lot at night to help me relax and be able to fall asleep.

Sage has our old cell phone for his play phones and he will walk around all day with it up to his ear. It is so funny to watch this small child "talking" on a cell phone. And he is obsessed with the garbage. He likes to take things out and put things in.

Drew is working at studio today all day. It is a bummer. I am sick of this school thing. When can we just have a somewhat normal life?

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Who wants Diet Coke?

Apparently Sage does. As I was cleaning up the floor from his lunch, he walked over to the computer, reached up and grabbed my glass of diet coke, which came spilling down on his face, back and of course all over the floor! It was pretty funny. I was bending over sweeping up the floor of crumbs and I hear this fffffiiiiiiizzzzzz and then crying. I look up to see Sage standing there with the glass still held above his head tipped over. He wasn't too happy. I don't know if the fizz got in his eye but I was laughing too hard to comfort him, which probably didn't make him happier. He lived through it. We changed his clothes and I cleaned up another mess made by Sage. I did think to put him in the pack-n-play while I cleaned so there wasn't another mess waiting for me.

So, we have this booster seat. Made by First Years. The top tray comes off for easy washability or as Sage figured out, easy dumpability. We scratched the top tray. The tray also swivels for easy one handed in and out of the child. Sage figured out that if he pushed with his feet and pulled with his hands, he can also get this tray off. So, we have now put a phone book on the seat for him to sit on and pull him up to the table for meals where he is learning to eat off a plate. Which he has figured out, is even easier to dump than the two previous trays. We are also exploring the world of self feeding with a fork. I thought fingers were messy but boy this fork does so much more! Fingers threw food onto the floor, forks mash food into tiny crumbs so they can be deposited on the floor by the fingers. For the next baby, we will buy a plastic high chair and I will read a ton of online reviews before I buy it. Moral of the story: Don't buy First Years Swivel Tray Booster Seat- it stinks!

Monday, October 03, 2005

15 weeks and 2 days

That is the official count of how far along I am. I weighed in at 147.5, up 4 pounds from last visit. The baby's heart rate was 148. My ultrasound is Monday, October 24 at 1:00pm.

I tried to lay Sage down for a nap at my friends house while I went to an appointment this afternoon but no such luck on the nap part. She said he was really good though when he was up. So his afternoon nap was 15 minutes in the car. Oh well. Win some, lose some.

I took Sage to the park yesterday and he went head first down the twisty slide. He learned it from his cousins in Iowa and had no doubts about it when we got there. It was pretty funny, especially considering last time we tried to video him going down the slide, he bonked his head on the side and didn't enjoy it so much. It is fun to watch him grow up! He loved being outside in my friend's backyard today. He just walked all around, put rocks in his mouth and was pretty dirty by the time we came in!