I did something stupid. I made a mistake. Again. Is there a theme on this blog of the stupid things I've done?
I weighed myself. And then. I tried on a pair of pre-pregnancy jeans.
And none, zero, zip, nada, not one shirt fits either.
I'm stuck wearing maternity jeans and t-shirts. And not cute t-shirts, t-shirts of various colleges and places I've been. And quite honestly, even those are a little tight.
And I know, it has only been 5 days. But, I have had to actually leave my house. Levi's bilirubin level is up. I had to take him to the doctor yesterday and then to the lab for his blood work. It went up from 12.2 yesterday to 13.5 today. The doctor wants it retested tomorrow except that the lab is closed tomorrow. I'm not worried and I know I should lay him in direct sunlight but we aren't getting any sunlight in our house today.
I probably have a little bit of the baby blues. Kind of weepy. Irritable. Or maybe I'm just not getting enough sleep.
I can totally talk myself out of my thinking. I am so thankful for my beautiful, perfect baby and for my mom doing all my work. I haven't cooked or cleaned up from a meal. Sage and Kolby are so adoring to Levi. Especially Sage. He loves to hold him, he talks to him and is so sweet. Kolby is sweet too if not always gentle!
I have so many thoughts and emotions rolling around in my head. Most of them kind of silly and probably selfish too.