Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Morning to Evening

Dinner is cleaned up. 

Lunches are packed for tomorrow.

Baths have been given.

Drew is putting the boys to bed after he rocked Annkia to sleep  (she hopefully will be waking up to eat once more).

And the house is quiet. 

Ahh.

I have moments of pure bliss.  The thought "I could have another one."  totally swims through my head.  Followed by, "I want to homeschool." 

Then, I have moments of "What in the heck am I doing?!  I can't handle these kids." 

The moments that I think what in heck are the moments when I'm a) trying to get something done (laundry, sweep the floor, etc) and keep getting interrupted or b) when I'm trying to do something for myself (like on the internet for myself, not go to the bathroom kind of thing). 

So, basically, when I put my kids and their needs first, I feel great and they feel great.  When I try to put my desires before their needs, we spiral downward.  Those are extreme statements but generally true. 

Does that make sense? 

There must be a deeper lesson that I am too tired to convey. 

This morning, I really wanted to go on a walk.  We took Kolby to school and then when we got home, I fed Annika and tried putting her back in her carseat to go in the stroller.  She got mad.  I put shoes on Levi.  She was still mad.  I got the stroller out of the van.  Still mad.  I loaded Levi in the stroller. Still mad.  I put her in the stroller.  Really angry.  We walked 100 feet and I turned around and came home.  Except I got mad.  Mad at the baby who wouldn't stop crying, mad because I wasn't getting to do what I wanted to do.  {Am I 2?! Don't answer that.} 

We got in the house, I took her out of her carseat and she instantly stopped crying.  I held her for a bit and then put her in her bouncy seat.  Where she proceeded to fall asleep.  Really, she couldn't have fallen asleep in the carseat in the stroller?  I had let it go by that point.  And I did get stuff done around the house.  So, there's that. 

After picking up Kolby from school, Levi had fallen asleep in the car and Annika had screamed the whole way there, while waiting in line and the whole way home.  She's persistent.  I got her out of her car seat and she instantly stopped crying (see a trend?).  Then I tried to get Levi out, except he wasn't waking up.  So, I had Annika in one arm and Levi in the other and an SUV slows way down and a lady hands me a business card and says "Maybe I help you?"  She's a cleaning lady.  Wonder why she thought I needed help!

10 comments:

  1. Ha! I am cracking up about the cleaning lady's offer. Did you take her up on it!?!?

    I am so with you on the mindset thing...I'm reading The Mission of Motherhood right now, and it is SO convicting. When I voluntarily serve my kids, everyone wins. When I'm selfish? Not so much. -Sigh- So when will I get it???

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  2. If only we weren't so selfish, huh?! I feel the same way often.
    Marketa and Callum used to cry a LOT in their carseats too. It got better around 4 months, I think. Also, I think Marketa was really uncomfortable--I finally remembered to get her adjusted at the chiro and she seemed much happier.

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  3. Oh, that cleaning lady cracks me up. And you totally could use the help, couldn't you? :)

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  4. Okay, I can TOTALLY relate to this post. I feel like the days when I have an agenda and need to get stuff done are the days when everyone is crabby and frustrated and then the days when I say, "I'm just going to play with them today," go really well. The problem is that I do have to get stuff done sometimes, so I am trying to figure that out. Sigh.

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  5. Our lives are so similar these days. Annika and Levi and Kolby = Teddy and Archie and Beatrix. Same ages, almost the same issues.

    Teddy hates his car seat. He is happiest being held. They all nap at the wrong times.

    But I don't have cleaning women handing their cards to me. Ha! Maybe you can take her up on that? I would.

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  6. "The thought 'I could have another one.' totally swims through my head. Followed by, 'I want to homeschool.'

    Then, I have moments of 'What in the heck am I doing?! I can't handle these kids.' "

    Did you read my mind yesterday? I actually DO homeschool and I still have this thought!

    My advice? Take the cleaning lady.

    WORTH. EVERY. PENNY!

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  7. Reading your posts/comments by other young Moms makes me smile as I remember those days...the challenges, joys, fun, frustrations, lessons, convictions...

    Those thots/feelings continue as the babies, toddlers, pre-schoolers grow to be school age, jr. high, high school, college, young adult years, marriage, married w/ children, though the circumstances/issues change.

    Once a Mom, always a Mom! Embrace it all and encourage one another in the wonderful, unpredictable journey. Lord willing, you'll have the JOY of being called GRANDMA someday!!

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  8. I just wanted to tell you it was so nice to meet you the other night! I had so much fun at the party! So glad we can now be blog friends too :)

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  9. You are such an amazing mom and wife.

    Love you.

    You deserve a cleaning lady. Think of the blessing you would be giving her family. Tell Drew I said so.

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  10. I miss you, Kristy! I know I always say that, but I really do! I liked how you said that when we put their needs first, all goes well. When we try to put our needs in front, it goes downhill. How true is that? *Sigh* Tomorrow is a new day!

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Comments make my day and bring a smile to my face, so thanks!