stream of conciousness

I went to the midwife this morning.  On the way there, Sage asked if I had to pee in a cup again.  Am I scarring him for life?  I missed my appointment last week because Kolby woke up with a 102 fever.  I tried a couple of babysitters but it didn't work out.  I didn't get my Group B strep test last week, so I got it today and she checked me because of my history with early dialation.

First, she felt my belly and said this will probably be my smallest baby and that's okay because girls tend to be smaller.  If only that had translated to less weight gain!  She felt her back and where I'm getting all the feet kicks, she said her head was down but didn't feel too low.  I agreed, I've had some pressure but nothing too incredible.

After the test, she checked me out and said her head is really low.  Lower than she had thought, she didn't want to do an invasive check but she was sure I was 3 probably more towards 4 cm.

After having 3 babies, I kind of knew this is the information we would get, but it still makes me nervous.  She also told us to keep some stuff in the car so we don't ruin it.  Maybe I should have asked what kinds of things.  I just pictured puppy's pee pads.  Do you think that's what she meant?  She also suggested trying to stay off my feet as much as possible.  "I don't know if you have help at home..."  I've gotten that question a couple times in the last couple of months.

Kolby's scabs are healing slower than we thought, so no cast this week.  God's timing is perfect.  God's timing is perfect.  God's timing is perfect.  Drew is fighting our insurance company to get the Ponseti certified dr. in Houston covered.  His benefits advocate found some loophole about a certified doctor being covered within 75 miles.  I'm still praying that God will guide/force us to the right doctor.  The Houston dr. would be so much more convenienant but we haven't met him, what if he's not nice or is just wrong for us?

Also, since I just had the Group B strep test, if I were to go into labor before next week, I would be treated like I was positive just in case.  I'm really praying to keep her in at least one more week and then we'll reevaluate.

My thoughts go back and forth from Kolby to the baby, Kolby, baby, Kolby, baby.  With a little of Sage is starting school soon.

We got Kolby's new shoes to wear at night and I'm so happy to tell you that he has adjusted perfectly to them.  He's worn them 4 nights and it's kind of like he never stopped wearing them.  Click here to see what they look like.  They keep his feet turned out at 60 degrees.

I feel like we are totally ready for this baby, except the whole Group B strep thing.  God's timing is perfect.  God's timing is perfect.

Do you think there is a lesson for me to learn here?